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Vows Should Be Removed From Weddings
Couples should write general statements of love and adoration for their mates. The Standard marriage vows are impossible to keep. Think about it "do you Mary promise to love and obey your husband? To promise never to leave someone under any circumstances is a lie. And it contradicts the constitution of freedom to "leave". If you have the freedom to leave and divorce why make the promise. The first marriage in the bible was performed by God according to Genesis, God did not have Adam and Eve Take Vows. Actually according to the bible God discourages vows
 Calvin  16 Aug 2008 06:26
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I am very slow to agree with this debate, but ultimately, I think that yes, certain portions of the standard vows should be eliminated, for very good reasons. These are those good reasons:

1. Does ANYONE actually know what "unto thee do I plight thee my troth" means? I mean, let's get real here.....;-)

2. It has been my experience with the matrimonial community, that those who make the grandest most flourishing promises, actually DO THE LEAST amount of follow-through in real life.

Therefore, with the two aforementioned reasons as listed above, I agree with this debate.

Additionally? I submit that to remove all vows, might it not evolve for couples that to say less is to do more?

The less promises made the most probable to actually almost live up to the highest standards of what it actually MEANS to BE married? Not just GET married: Any fool can do that much.
But what I intend to get across is, actually STAY married.
READ: Succeed at living the implied vows rather than big empty promises no one can or will or does even keep.
 
 Scorpion  16 Aug 2008 19:51
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 Good Call.. except for when we disagree....lol
by  Calvin
 17 Aug 2008 04:16
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What I'm agreeing to is the idea that the institution of marriage is due for an update, whether it be the vow, the legal terms or duration, the obligations should it come to an end, etc. And there are several other debates in this forum where we've posted more on this. Personally, I see the vows themselves as a quaint throwback to the past, and it's not the vow itself which is legally binding, it's the act itself. And you're right that the context of being shackled to that person forever essentially losing your freedom despite unhappiness and with a virtual guarantee of mutual destruction if you break the deal is an unrealistic legal requirement and often harms society as much as some think it helps.
 
 Grenache  16 Aug 2008 12:21
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 I like how you put it "SHACKLED" I can see you standing infront of the state senate right now.........Speaking: "no one should be shackled" GIVE ME FREE!!
by  Calvin
 17 Aug 2008 04:18
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With out vows you have no covenant relationship. The cermony would be useless like a used condom.
 
 offcgibby  07 Dec 2011 17:43
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If you can't promise to love someone unconditionally and be faithful to them then you have absolutely no business getting married to them in the first place.
 
 dlmiller82  06 Jun 2010 21:42
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A general statement makes a general marriage.

The whole point of a wedding is to promise someone that you will stick by them for the rest of your life. If you're not ready to promise that, don't get married.
 
 bookworm3  13 Nov 2008 23:17
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That is a wedding! You can tell some you will love them for ever anywhere but it means nothing with out promises!

Vows don't contradict love! If you love someone enough it doesn't matter about the promises you make to them because you love them. And parent and child love- that's not what the subject it about! Also that is a totally different type of love!
 
 Balance_92  16 Aug 2008 18:11
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 The vows contradict love. When you love someone you don't need to make a vow. Love grows out of ones freedom to choose. I don't know of any parent who took a vow to Love their child, Until death do they part, but it seems to me that parental love has more success than marital love.
While children have the ability to divorcce their parents how much people do you hear actually do it?... And that's all without a vow.
by  Calvin
 16 Aug 2008 18:29
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What you point out is not an issue with marriage. It is an issue with government's involvement in marriage and the family.

Once the government recognized marriage as a legally binding contract, not a spiritual one, marriage was doomed.

The vows are the most important aspect of the spiritual commitment in a marriage. They are symbolic of love, honor, and commitment. It is no small irony that "law" does nothing to embrace or protect the first two.
 
 Cons_Lies  16 Aug 2008 16:31
 5 Comments
 
 Well the church is a part of the problem also. Because there are people who believes that it is the Priests / Pastor that marries you. Actually The priest or Pastor does not have the authority to "marry" anyone but his own spouse. It is the couples who have the authority to marry each other with or without the priest or pastor or clergy. And that is stated in the constitution.

People are being deceived about the Truth about marriage.
by  Calvin
 16 Aug 2008 18:32
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