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I have fell in to that trap way too many times. [sigh] |
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None of us befriend someone, because they seem in dire need of a friend, nor do we do it out of the
pure goodness in our hearts. We are all self-motivated with out individual self-interests. As long
as you have something to offer the other "friend," then both of you will reap the rewards of your
friendship.
If these things weren't true, then everyone would be friends with everyone else, but we CHOOSE our
friends, just as we are also chosen. |
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Friendship? That's how I would up married four times, LOL LOL LOL
Yeah. Things can come of being "friends". |
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It's possible. Some people are like that. They want to take an advantages from others so they try to
make friend. We can't know their true intention when they come and make friend with us. I met that
kind of person a lot in my life. I wish for the people, who wants true friend, will not meet that
kind of person in their life |
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It happens. |
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This goes along with my philosophy, Greedism, that all human advances are made by humans wanting
something. Take for example a caveman. Our caveman is starving. He sees his tribemate with a big
hunk of meat, but he's afraid of this guy. So he improvises a way to kill the caveman for the meat.
This is a good argument for my case, so I agree. |
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It can, but it is not the best way to start and won't be as likely to be as good. |
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I would suppose the people in the friendship would have to be accepting of such a scenario which is
pretty easy to imagine but I'm sure there are people that refute people that think that way as truly
"friendship material"... I would think there'd be an element of mistrust there too but to each his
own |
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That is true. The first time i thought of being a particular person's friend it was originally to
make my ex and her ex uncomfortable because they were best friends. They thought if we ever spoke
that we'd find out some dirt. Either way she is now my best friend and as i stated previously the
two men are no longer in the picture. I think now too bad i hadn't talked with her sooner. |
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Yes it should be lowered because people like the drink i should be lowered to 10 |
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I don't think it's right to take advantage of people, but I do believe it is possible to get a
friendship out of something that didn't start off "text" book like. I have met all kinds of friends
in weird situations, just because it starts off bad, doesn't mean it will end badly. I agree with
this statement. |
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It is true that you can grow to be very close friends with someone even though your friendship
started off as a mutual give and take relationship. This has been observed that even at times true
friendships develop between people who had been on very bad terms earlier.
So, it is not your initial intent that matters the most on the contrary the bond that you develop
with time is of more significance. |
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For many of my friends, selfish as it may sound, I can see that I was taking advantage of some
condition they possessed, be it someone that's smart and could help you with homework, someone who's
rich and generous with their cash, or someone that's strong and will protect you because they like
you. But after years of knowing them, true friendship budded and we are now close as brothers, and
I'm glad that we met even under those kinds of circumstances. |
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The only thing I hope to gain from a friend is a friendship.......nothing else! |
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A true friendship is one such relationship which does not include any selfish motives within it. A
person can definitely expect and seek help from his or her friend but it is not a sign of a good
friendship. But if a friendship is true then it must not start with a point where one seeks to gain
something from the other. In that case there remains a self involved in it and we can not term it an
honest friendship. It is not right that we will only start having friendship with them from whom we
can gain something because not just material needs, we also need a friend to be by our side
emotionally. A true friend always tries to help the other friend even if not asked for, but to start
friendship in order to gain something is just not a correct thing to do. |
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Once that person knows what you have done they will not want to get to know you therefore crushing
the chances |
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GOOD friendships do NOT start when someone seeks to gain something that the other person possesses.
The relationship that starts that way will always remain rocky if for no other reason than that the
guilty one can't stop feeling guilty and may even expect "the other shoe to fall" and stop the
relationship. Should that happen, it would be no surprise.
I am glad that you who started this debate and Dhaopac used the word "many" when you wrote your
statement and response. Yes, there are many who do...and a friendship on that basis IS NO
FRIENDSHIP AT ALL. It remains simply as an acquaintance with no qualities of what we call
'friendship."
Years ago, I read a statement that I continue to follow. It fits here. "THE MEASURE OF ONE'S
CHARACTER IS WHAT HE/SHE WOULD DO IF HE/SHE KNEW THAT HE/SHE WOULD NEVER BE FOUND OUT." If a person
realized or found that they are just being used for the other's gain, the whole relationship would
die quickly.
True friendships among males or females do not start with such a motive. They start with an honest
attraction between 2 people that leads to a relationship that benefits both persons in ways that add
to the relationship; they never develop in a one-sided, possessive or "procurement' way.
True 'bestfriendship' as well as 'good friendships' start and remain honest, steadfast, caring,
trusting, and have similar positive aspects. Women can be closer friends than sisters. Men can be
closer friends than brothers. Sometimes a man and a woman can have good friendships lasting over
years....among these are a gay man and a lesbian who have no interest in romance in their
relationship.
I WISH EVERY PERSON COULD HAVE FRIENDSHIPS AS GREAT AS MY 33-YEAR FRIENDSHIP AND MY 45-YEAR
FRIENDSHIP. They are the greatest examples of friendship without any expectations other than a
shared and true relationship. |
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22 Jan 2008 16:05
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